Wealth inequality is approaching an all time high, roving gangs of thugs are disappearing humans across major cities in America, young men are being encouraged to break their own faces in the hopes of achieving sharp jaw lines. Colleges are becoming day cares for the rich and dumb. More and more people think it’s ok to start sentences with “I asked ChatGPT…”. Can’t find a topo chico anywhere. The only way to achieve social mobility is to hit it big in a betting app but those are being run by elected officials with inside information. The president has effectively turned the federal government into his personal money making scheme. The billionaire pedophile ring was REAL and the guy that’s supposed to be prosecuting and investigating it is out in the Olympics getting drunk and being named honorary white boy. There’s wars and rumors of wars and ongoing genocides all over the world. Everything is getting worse and worse every day.

The enshittifaction of the world is real. In the face of all this there is only one thing that stands against the tide of horribleness that is engulfing the harsh reality of our day to day and like haystack rock withstanding a pummeling against the sea plainly and calmly says. No. The Big Arch.

The latest in a series of behemoths to come out of the labs at McDonalds that sit atop the size scale. The Big Arch unlike the Double Big Mac and the Grand Mac before it (let’s pretend the chicken big mac didn’t exist) is not a variant of the Big Mac instead it is a whole new genus of burger. The Spinosaurus, to the Big Mac’s T-Rex. I believe it’s the first McDonalds burger to feature a poppy and sesame seed bun, and these buns are thicc. It also has two types of onions, raw and crispy fried onions. THREE slices of WHITE cheddar cheese, which I didn’t trust right away, and a whole new signature sauce, the Arch sauce. There’s three components it shares with other McDonalds burgers, pickles, lettuce, and the patties are the same you would find in a double quarter pounder.

When these ingredients come together though it creates something all together wonderful. The Arch sauce is distinct from Mac Sauce, it’s more tangy. There’s a bit more of a punch to it that doesn’t exist in Mac sauce which is more mellow. The double onion works especially when you get a crisp fresh onion then a fried crispy one in the next bite, two different types of crisp. The thicker Quarter Pounder patties (as compared to the Big Mac patties) were a bit salty in my Big Arch but the triple slices of perfectly melting cheddar put up a valiant effort in combating that. I must admit I was proved wrong, the cheese worked. Especially the quantity of slices. The issue with the double big mac was that it was too messy and unwieldy. The ONLY issue with the Grandmac was that the patties felt a bit too thing. The Big Arch addresses both of these with those THICC buns. There’s really no other word to describe them, cus they really are beefy but they can handle all that sauce which is applied on both the top and bottom buns with ease. My Big Mac hack is always to ask for more sauce, that’s not necessary here. What I cannot stress enough is that when all these individual factors come together in a bite they produce a very satisfying experience, and it repeats every time until you finish it. The buns can handle the mess, the patties don’t fall apart. It’s a good burger. And I got full, I didn’t feel cheated.

At my McDonalds it was only 8.79. The meal was only one dollar more at 9.79. This puts the Big Arch at 116 calories per dollar which makes it a pretty good deal if not a food engineering marvel, like the gold standard McDouble which at 2.89 for 390 calories gives you 135 calories per dollar. It does however outclass its cousins the Double Quarter Pounder With Cheese at only 90 calories per dollar (8.19 for 740 calories) and the Big Mac at 98 calories per dollar ( 5.89 for 580 calories) I know the price is different across the country but I do feel like this is a sweet spot for it.

I had it for lunch today, and I enjoyed every bite. Afterwards I was satisfied, and full, and didn’t even hate myself more than I did before I started eating it. I had an experience in a fast food restaurant that didn’t make my life worse. It was a strange feeling especially in 2026, it reminded me of better times. Maybe, just maybe we’re gonna be okay. Or maybe I find myself once again going to McDonalds in a tough time in my life when life feels hollow and like a staged play where nothing matters and this simple food can provide a sense of comfort and refuge. Maybe I just needed a win and having a decent burger for a not crazy price was exactly the right dosage of hope to go on a little bit more.

• McDonalds didn’t pay me for this but if they wanna send me some merch I’ll rock it.

• Accusing me of romanticizing fast food would be fair.

• I believe everything I wrote full heartedly.

I logged 46 movies on letterboxd this year, and 31 of those I watched for the first time. So Let’s get into it.

10. Cloud

I’m really not big into horror so I was hesitant to watch this one but I’m glad I did. It wasn’t horror, it was creepy at times. One scene in particular with a weird encounter on a bus literally made me jump out my seat and feel weird for a few minutes afterwards. The movie itself deals with the way in which we treat each other online, scam culture, not treating others as humans and the protagonist is especially detached and has totally commodified others. It’s unsettling. The second half of the movie also becomes a pretty strange action movie. Overall very enjoyable.

9. Black Bag

When spy movies are good they’re among the most entertaining in the medium. This one was very good. Also super problematic view on therapists. Photography was a little TOO stylized but it’s alright.

8. Wake Up Dead Man

From a purely “this is my type” of movie Wake Up Dead Man is fantastic. An indictment on the religious institutions of America who have lost their ways and become obsessed with the culture war and forgotten the true value of the message they carry, told by the guy who made the best Star Wars movie. The only reason why this wasn’t higher was because the mystery itself was sorta easy? Mila Kunis also seemed miscast, and Benoit Blanc just didn’t hit the same. Still in almost every other year, this movie would have been like top 3. I don’t doubt I’ll come back to watch it again when I feel despair at something horrific done in the USA in the name of God.

7. Sinners

There’s one scene in this that is maybe the most beautiful scene in any movie this year. The power of music transcending time and space. I deeply regret not watching this in IMAX.

6. The Brutalist

For me this movie really is two in one, conveniently split by an intermission in theaters. In the first half, a twisted promise, but a promise nonetheless. The second a destruction of the soul with a disturbing ending. The arrival to America scene still lives in my mind, and the photography throughout this is beautiful. Still, think the ending is problematic.

5. Marty Supreme

After this one and the Rock movie I guess we know who the more talented director out of the two Safdies is. Feels as tense as Good Time and Uncut Gems, with Chalamet playing essentially himself. That being said there’s some very funny lines and of course as with any Safdie movie a perfect ensemble of character actors. My favorite bit is when Chalamet won’t let Mr. Wonderful brag about his son “dying” for a concentration camp survivor.

4. One Battle After Another

You know, it’s hard not to try and frame every movie a director makes as autobiographical in a sense but this one really does sorta feel that way. PTA reckoning with failing in his revolution and entrusting it to his kid. But even if it were just that it’s enough. The displaying of the government dehumanization of immigrants and the banality of the racism in the foundational infrastructure of this country are shown so effortlessly and never feeling preachy. Beautiful cinematography too, which is probably aided by the fact that many scenes feature El Paso.

3. Flow

I’m a sucker for animation, always. Especially animation wielded to tell stories that would be too distracting in live action. Flow is exactly that. If I were to tell you “It’s about a cat surviving a flood” it sounds like the most boring movie of all time, but that’s exactly what it’s about at the surface level and yet as the movie goes on you being to see so much of “human nature” expressed through the various animals portrayed in the movie and you feel and care so much for their wellbeing. Masterful stuff. Capybara the goat. This is what I thought The Wild Robot was going to be.

2. Train Dreams

Maybe if I would have seen this movie last year, or next year it wouldn’t be so high up but I really needed this one. Truthfully, 2025 was a brutal year for me in many ways. Instability all around, changed plans, health issues for family, emotional issues not to mention all the bullshit happening at a societal level. I felt a not unfamiliar profound sadness seeping into my every day. For a large part of the year I felt as if everything would be better if I wasn’t around. Like the darkness I carried with me was too much of a burden on those around. Still, maybe that’s valuable. Maybe that’s needed. Maybe that’s just as much a part of life as the moments of joy. Perhaps as a character in the movie says “A dead tree is just as important as a living one”. The simple quiet, beautiful, devastating life of the protagonist in this movie presented in truly dreamlike photography with a narration that really worked for me truly made me feel like there is space for me in this world. I will forever love it.

1. Sing Sing

Utterly beautiful in every sense of the word. The prison system in this country is a disgrace and has destroyed the lives of an untold number of people, and yet even in that setting one can find people who just refuse to let their souls be crushed. The fact that so many of the actors in this movie played themselves was such a welcome surprise when I saw the credits of it. “We are here to become human again” was such a gut punch. Truly just a beautiful movie, Colman Domingo deserves every award for this movie. Watch this. Watch it again if you already have. Remember how good it was. Also Gred Kwedar and Clint Bentley wrote my top two movies this year with one directing each, so I guess I got two dudes to keep an eye on looking forward.

Honorable Mentions:

One of Them Days: Keke Palmer is amazing.

Tron Ares: Only the soundtrack.

The Colors Within: Really nailed how special it is to make music in a group.

I still have high hopes for the series and hope that the promise of speaking a diverse group of men is actually fulfilled and that the exploration is focused on making Latino Men themselves feel more visible and not scapegoated. I don’t know the statistics of the listenership of the show but making a show about Latino Men for Latino Men to listen to and not be shamed, instead understood and brought to light seems to me very valuable. There’s lots of Latino doofuses out there so it could be difficult and potentially problematic to do so but if the show is truly interested in “doing the work” and in not just being more of the same they’ll show us, warts and all.

With that said I was very encouraged when the second episode featured no professional political operatives but two normal people. Young dudes, from Texas, one who voted for Kamala and one who voted for Trump.

The discussion ranged from why they voted for who they voted for, their history of political activity, their most significant encounter with what they consider Latino manhood (both said their dad), the issues that matter to them, there was significant time devoted to immigration, before moving on to THEIR definition of Latinidad and finally hopes for the future. All in all it was an OK conversation. I’m not going to step through the whole thing but I want to highlight a few things

First of all, this conversation went on to show the malleability of the electorate. Alexis the Trump guy, said he at first didn’t like Trump he considered him a racist, BUT one of his friends was into the guy and because of that he watched a rally of his live on youtube then later on saw coverage of the rally on TV that he considered disingenuous. That plus a background of “hard work” and prices going up on “everything” made him go Trump. Never addressing when/if Trump ever stopped being racist. Simply stating that Trump was a showman. Alejandro, the Kamala guy, said he voted for her simply because he has always voted for Democrats and that Kamala was “the daughter of immigrants”. When pushed for three issues he supported the third one was “Worker support and safety nets” which….yeah how exactly did Kamala Harris promise that?

If these two are any indication it further highlights the insane fumble of the Democratic party. There was no compelling path forward set by the Democrats no legitimate better vision for the future, simply identity and platitudes without plans. The opposition, Trump, simply had to blame them for everything and claim, without a plan, that he will make it all better. That’s enough. Apparently enough to overlook the fact that the man running for president calls you and your family a bunch of rapists and criminals. A competent vision of improving, providing a pathway to a better tomorrow, and not an obsession with saying everything is fine and that there’s “joy” would have done way better.

Secondly, it seems clear to me now that the intended audience of this series is not Latinos. So at the top Maria Hinojosa says that these two men are of very similar socioeconomic backgrounds, however one of them is born and raised in Dallas the other is born and raised and has a long line of family in the RGV. Just based on THAT any latino from Texas could have told you these dudes are not anywhere near the same. Sure the statistics may have them bunched together. The Border and Dallas are so different culturally, especially when one of them openly says him and his family have aimed for full assimilation. Maybe the only thing that would have been shared is a fandom of the Dallas Cowboys but Alexis, the RGV guy, is 21 so he’s probably not a Cowboys fan. There’s a point shared by both that Latinos are not a monolith, which is duh, they even both say it in the conversation in their own flavor. Still, presenting these two men from vastly different places culturally as “similar” seemed a bit more….geared towards the whites.

Anyway, I’ll still keep listening.

Listen to the second episode of Hombre here: https://www.latinousa.org/2025/02/16/hombretwovoters/

For me, when I’m bored, I just search up “Hasta Que te Conoci Reaction” and I can easily sink hours into it. This is one of the great performances ever. It features Juan Gabriel at his peak, at Bellas Artes, the crowning moment of his career. The song itself just has such a great trajectory it starts with just guitar strumming, a mariachi group that also features an accordion (the accordion player with a cowboy hat cus it’s not a traditional mariachi instrument, and more of a norteño instrument is just perfect too) and Juan Ga just belting out the most emotional beginning to a song. Total Silence. “Hasta que……………..te conoci” full mariachi kicks in. JuanGa shimmies, sings more. The Song builds to a point where JuanGa goes a cappella again, the mic not even in view, then the entire orchestra kicks in and you’re off to the outer edges of the solar system.

Seriously, watch it. Maybe record a reaction video to it yourself. For this particular song and really any JuanGa song the Reaction video effect is so much better when it’s people who aren’t Mexican or aren’t familiar with Juan Gabriel or aren’t from the border. It just has that little extra bit of pride.

But for those of us that have already seen this hundreds if not thousands of time. Here’s some of my favorites:

This is just a small sampling of the thousands of videos out there.

Now if you don’t wanna cry alone go watch some “Amor Eterno” Reaction videos.

Chuck Rocha is a a Democratic Party strategist, and former union organizer who is the president of Solidarity Strategies. He’s from outside Tyler Texas, wears a cowboy hat and has an East Texas accent. Last year he also hosted a “Latino Men for Kamala Harris” which had George Lopez as its headliner and a bunch of other congressmen and Washington figures which spoke of nothing but bland mamadas and said “Chinga tu Maga” at some point. Legitimately almost turned it off then, but much like another famous Democrat Hillary Clinton, nevertheless I persisted.

There’s a fair bit of establishing who Chuck is and why Maria Hinojosa, host of Latino USA, is speaking with him before they get to the guts of the conversation. Why did Latino Men vote for Trump? And when talking about this Chuck has plenty of good points that show he has an understanding of the people. There’s an emphasis on the working class, on worker’s rights, on providing a path out of the working class for people but time and time again he falls back to the same points of blame that Democrats have been using. It’s like he wants to overtly say Democrats abandoned the Working Class but can’t. At one point Hinojosa brings up her Guatemalan bodega sandwich guy having anti immigrant sentiments and Chuck goes on to bring up Fox News and the “brosphere” podcasts which are outpacing the communication that Democrats are using, which…sure but I highly doubt that kind of Latino is listening to the Shawn Ryan show. Young Pocho blowhards sure…

Chuck’s ultimate big point when talking about Democrats’ outreach to Latino Men is “The message is broken” to which I say, actually, there is no message. Even in the aforementioned Zoom that was organized by Chuck, where he probably got paid a handsome amount, there was no message. Puras platitudes y payasadas. Chuck is right that Latino Men often feel overlooked and ignored and he’s right that the Democratic party does not talk to them anymore. However, this message coming from a Political strategist doesn’t really carry as much weight as one would hope. Chuck could have a great story and background but as soon as one hears “political strategist” you’ve lost half the room. The Democrat’s problem is they’re being guided too much by political consultants and have lost touch with the real people, the working class. Too much political messaging and not enough earnest communication. For as well intentioned and as compelling a communicator Chuck is, he is still the beneficiary of a system that has failed the working class and needs severe reformation. Which is unlikely to come from someone whose livelihood depends on that very system existing.

This is also the problem with Latino Media. It has nothing to do with “woke” it has to do with all of it feeling like a Student Council meeting. Instead of engaging with the people, it engages too much with people “in power”. I swear we don’t need Eva Longoria or Julian Castro in everything, much less George Lopez. Which is why I was a little disappointed that the first guest for this series was THE political strategist for the losing side that stopped short of saying “We messed up”. Which raises the final question, who is this series for? Is it for Latino Men? Doesn’t feel that way. Is it for Latino women? Doesn’t feel that way. At least not when you put a political strategist on first…

I still have high hopes for the series and hope that the promise of speaking a diverse group of men is actually fulfilled and that the exploration is focused on making Latino Men themselves feel more visible and not scapegoated. I don’t know the statistics of the listenership of the show but making a show about Latino Men for Latino Men to listen to and not be shamed, instead understood and brought to light seems to me very valuable. There’s lots of Latino doofuses out there so it could be difficult and potentially problematic to do so but if the show is truly interested in “doing the work” and in not just being more of the same they’ll show us, warts and all. I’ll be listening.

Listen to the first episode of Latino USA’s Hombres here or anywhere podcasts are found: https://www.latinousa.org/2025/01/12/hombrechuckrocha/

Tamales, Doña Lupita Tamales

There was a time when we’d make our own tamales. It was fun, but it also sucked. It’s a lot of work. Especially when you don’t have one of those stand mixers to amasar. Which my parents don’t own to this day. The big difference in what separates a good tamal from a mediocre or bad one is the masa. You have to avoid Maseca, or anything that has maseca. It’s yellower and tastes weird, gives your tamales a weird texture. Gotta find masa, straight, preferably from a tortilleria. Most places around El Paso usually sell them “preparada” or not. Preparada just means they already mixed some lard in there, and should be good to go. Still even if you get it that way you may have to still add some fat and mix it in some more. The test to tell if masa is ready or not is to take a little pinch roll it in a ball and drop it in a glass of water, it should float. Other places around Dallas sell masa already mixed with chile colorado…which I’m not a fan of.

This year we didn’t make our own tamales.

My parents over the last few weeks took a tamal tour of El Paso hitting up bakeries and tamalerias looking for what would be good. A shocking amount of them had maseca masa, others were either too skimpy on the filling, or the filling was just not good. The winning spot ended up being less than one mile from home in the lower valley of El Paso.

Doña Lupita’s tamales were a good size, perfectly cooked. PLenty of meat, good level of spice and exceptional masa. Really solid tamales. I ate three immediately..then two more. We reheated them using a steaming pot and they tasted and felt fresh, but my favorite is always on a comal. Tamales are a christmas staple in El Paso, but are eaten year round. Still, they go extra hard on christmas when it’s (supposed to be) cold. These were the first thing I had and continued to be eaten throughout the trip. It wasn’t really cold the whole trip, now that I’m back in DFW it’s freezing and I’m craving tamales.

Barbacoa, Barbacoa El Güero

Traditionally Barbacoa is a weekend thing. The Borderland is dotted with businesses that just sell this one meat, by the pound with tortillas or bolillos, onion, cilantro, a little bit of lime, and red salsa. I say one meat but it’s really a mix of all kinds of part of the cow’s head. Slow cooked and shredded. It’s super flavorful and soft, but it can get a little greasy which is why El Güero was so good. It was a very clean barbacoa. We got about 3 lbs and I lost count at how many tacos I had like the one above. One thing, Barbacoa at least here in the border, pairs best with Coke. Mexican coca cola. From a glass bottle.

While tacos and lonches are the most popular at places like these where you order Barbacoa by the pound, my favorite barbacoa delivery method is actually in a burrito and with a little bit of pinto beans in there. Burritos Crisostomo in El Paso is my favorite burrito de barbacoa.

This was our Christmas Eve breakfast and we had it there in the store, looking out the window at the crowded parking lot and people lining up for the bakery a few doors down picking up their tamal order. I sort of hope this becomes a traditional Christmas Eve breakfast.

Discada de mi Papa, Buche

On the 25th we forewent a traditional Christmas meal in favor of something simpler and definitely more delicious. Two types of tacos Discada, and Buche.

Discada originated in Northern Mexico and is traditionally cooked in discos a sort of cast iron wok originally made from busted up plows. Every single family that makes discada has their own recipe and honestly a lot of them suck. I have some tacos on what does or doesn’t belong on a discada, but I’ll just say get your stupid green onions outta there. I also once got invited to one that had potatoes. I almost left the place. Anyway, ours is simple, it's all meat. It has cubed beef, pork, chorizo, bacon, bologna, ham, and winnies. Because the quantity was small it wasn’t made in a disco but indoors in a cast iron pan. It still hits. It’s one of my favorite things my dad cooks and I like it with Guacamole, and a liiiiiiitle bit of lime. Not pictured here is Green jalapeño salsa but I don’t add it on all of them. The top two are discada.

Buche, aka pork stomach, these are popular all over Mexico. The texture on these is great, the chunks of stomach are first boiled then cut up an seasoned. We bought the buche prepared already from Food City and then just added a little bit of Chorizo which is why it’s a bit darker. For Buche I also put on some pico de gallo and red salsa. It’s good, It’s the bottom one.

I like Buche, but I love discada. Something about the variety of meats, the saltiness the hits of bacon you get. It’s perfect. I love it. I had about 9 tacos total. Best Christmas meal.

Chilaquiles de mi Papa

Growing up, all of my dad’s cooking was done outside over an open flame. Carnes asadas, or discada, or tripas, even carnitas. Whatever, it was all outside. Over the last ten years my mom’s been hit with a number of chronic illnesses which has led to my dad moving most of his cooking to inside. He now cooks for both of them, and for us too when we go back. If you would have told me this would have been the case growing up I wouldn’t have believed you. His cooking has really been great in the last decade. His chilaquiles and beans are very good. I asked him where he got the recipe for them and he says they’re my mom’s recipe but I don’t really remember having much chilaquiles growing up. Maybe a handful of times. Tostadas, chile colorado, muenster cheese. Plenty of chile colorado you can see there’s no plain tostada color peeking through and pinto beans with eggs. There’s a sliiiight crispiness still left but honestly I think I like the mushier bits more. Especially because it helps sop up the egg yolk which I prefer runny.

Pizza, Peter Piper Pizza

There are 49 Peter Piper Pizza locations in the state of Texas, 16 of them are in the El Paso region. The DFW metroplex has 2. I joke alot about Peter Piper but it is an institution in El Paso. It’s been there my entire life. Growing up a Peter Piper Pizza birthday party was the coolest thing a kid could have, and I wanted one my whole life. I didn’t get it until my 30s. I never set foot in a chuck e cheese’s, however the parent company of Chuck E Cheese, CEC entertainment, owns both Chuck E Cheese and Peter Piper. Still, Peter Piper’s pizza unlike the mouse places, is actually decent pizza. On one of my many trips there I creeped on the ovens and saw what I think was a chunk of mesquite coal in there, I’ve never been able to confirm that it is in fact mesquite charcoal but Peter Piper pizzas always have a nice solid bottom, a little bit smokey, and they’re delicious through and through.

I went there twice in ten days. Once to the lunch buffet with my friends from highschool and another for a birthday party. It was on back to back days, and I did not mind. I almost went three times. I’m telling you, an institution.

Kettle Cooked Flaming Hot Lays

This is a brief intermission because this is technically not cooked or from a local restaurant but I tried this on this trip and they’re officially my second favorite hot chip after Extra Hot Hot Cheetos. Take the superior texture of a kettle cooked chip and dust it with Flaming Hot Dust and it’s just perfect. You’re crazy for this one Richard.

I’ve looked in three 7 elevens, Target, Walmart, and Albertsons near my place in DFW and I can’t find them here.

Tacos de Suadero, Taconeta

This was my first stop at the new “Uptown” part of El Paso. Located immediately north of I-10 near Montana and Kansas there was a surprising amount of development around there including an apartment building with a very stunning mural of The Virgin of Guadalupe. I had heard of Taconeta before but had never been there and I didn’t know that there was this whole plan for this whole area.

The suadero was clean and flavorful, the tortilla was good, and the guacamole and salsa were perfect. A very satisfying taco, in a very cool place. Maybe a decade ago a place like this wouldn’t exist in El Paso and people would talk instead about how what El Paso needs is a Torchy’s Tacos and a Cheesecake Factory. Well, they still say that but I’m glad a place like this exists. It’s stylish, the tacos are more expensive than chico’s (even though a double a chicos tacos is 8.88 now), the ingredients are high quality, and they’re trying interesting things with their menu.

I also had a corn in a cup. Crucially the corn was white corn which is the superior corn for any and all elotes. Yellow corn is too sweet, texture too mushy. White corn handles everything better and has an immensely more satisfying bite.

Another plus to this meal es que me la picharon, shout out Roberto.

Menudo De mi Papa con Bolillo

The first meal of 2025 was a great one. Menudo, home made. There’s a couple of key distinctions of El Paso/Juarez style menudo from the rest of the Menudo of Mexico. For starters aside from the normal pansita meat, there’s also hominy in the soup. Secondly, and realistically the best difference is that rather than accompanying the menudo with a tortilla we do it with a toasted and buttered boillo or french bread. This combo is amazing, superior, the best thing you could possibly pair with a menudo.

Menudo is sold all over the borderland, especially on the weekend. I’d also say that’s true for mostly anywhere you’d find Mexicans. The way my dad makes it places a heavy emphasis on cleaning the cubed chunks of cow stomach multiple times. It can honestly be a stinky cooking process that no amount of bay leaves can cover up if you don’t do that. We don’t make it very spicy, but plenty savory. Add crushed oregano, diced fresh onions, and lime. The combination of the broth, soft cow stomach meat, bit of hominy and that soft buttery bread in every bite. Soups don’t get much better than this. Juarez style menudo is probably gonna be served in heaven.

Flautas, El Cometa

El Cometa is a Juarez taqueria/flauteria(?) that crossed over to El Paso a couple of years ago. It’s since opened 4 locations in the borderland. They sell tacos al pastor and de carne asada as well as sincronizadas and quesadillas all of them are solid. The tacos al pastor specifically aren’t really from a trompo, they’re just marinated pork straight on the griddle but they’re decent.

The real stars of the place are the flautas though. El Paso has it’s iconic flauta in Chico’s but Juarez also has one in La Pila. They’re single tortilla flautas, rolled and fried with shredded beef. Topped with a chile salsa and a side salad also traditionally paired with an apple soda. They’ve been around for more than 70 years and are THE Juarez Flauta.

El Cometa is like a maximalist version of the Juarez flauta. For starters, they’re bigger, you can easily down a Pila flauta in two bites, El Cometa’s are at least a 5 bite affair. Not only that but instead of just a chile salsa on top El Cometa has a cacophony of toppings on their flutas. Mexican crema all over them, heaps of requeson (think a creamier ricotta), Long thin slices of fresh onion and tomato. If that wasn’t enough the salsa bar at El Cometa also has Guacamole and green and red chile, lettuce, and cucumbers which you can also put on them and many do. I just go with Guacamole and Green chile. After all that is on the flautas, you’re gonna need a fork to eat them. I suspect that the flauta tortillas are thicker than normal because even with al lthe toppings you see above they keep their bite. I of course paired them with an apple soda.

El Cometa, and Juarez flautas in general are delicious.

Crispy Teriyaki Bowl, Mirai Bowl

On my last day in El Paso I decided to go for some nostalgia food and eat one of the dishes that got me through college. The Japanese food scene in El Paso isn’t exactly big, the Asian food scene in general isn’t that large however there are some good restaurants. Back in the late 20 naughts, Mirai Bowl served Japanese food fast in a number of locations around the city. The one near UTEP and the one on Montana were the ones I would go to. I remember feeling tha they were the real deal because the owners were Japanese, and they’d even a greeting as you walked in.

Mirai bowl had sushi rolls, Udon soup, bento boxes, but the student special was a teriyaki bowl and white or brown rice for 5 bucks, upcharge of I think 2 bucks if you got crispy chicken. I loved that lightly breaded crispy, almost karaage-like chicken. It had some soy based sauce that they would lighty spray on it as it topped the perfect rice cooker rice, just mix in a little of chilli garlic and I was in heaven. And it was cheap!

This time when I walked in there was no Japanese greeting, the employee at the front was some señora. The dude cooking was some señor. The Crispy chicken teriyaki was 12 bucks, the soda was 3. The menu no longer had udon noodles or bento boxes. Needless to say I wasn’t feeling the nostalgia. Until the bowl was presented to me and the smell hit my nostrils. It was the same, exactly as I remembered. Even better, cus I had forgotten the little bit of sesame seeds they’d top it with. Lighty breaded, hot, beautiful white rice, chilli garlic. I just wish it was 5 bucks still.

It took about two and a half a hours not counting the time it took to recharge my 3 batteries when I ran through the juice on all of them. Here are some thoughts I had during the process:

• That damn storm really came outta nowhere. This is gonna take forever. Can’t believe this tree fell down, stupid tree. Well it actually had lost a few limbs in the last actual big storm we had last year…so maybe it was just hanging on to life.

• I wish I had a real chainsaw, that had batteries that lost more than 15 minutes.

• I should probably wear safety glasses…..at least I’m wearing gloves.

• How long would it take to just burn this felled tree down? Would I get in trouble with the Ents for doing that? When Treebeard says “you should not be waking, eat earth, dig deep, drink water, go to sleep.” in the movies it’s really a line that Tom Bombadil says in the books, but Tom wasn’t in the movies. He’s in the Rings of Power Amazon show and he says that in it, but none of that is canon. At least I’m not sure if it is.

• I hope this tree didn’t suffer.

• It’s kinda cool that I at least have a physical obstacle/task that I’m slowly chipping away at. So much of the work I’m involved in otherwise is not physical. It’s not “real” in that way. I can’t see the impact of it in the real world, the heft and mass of it in my hands, in my back as I carry it to the curb. Slowly making an impact and seeing the pile grow in my curb. It’s really sort of rewarding.

• It’s sort of concerning that the Mavs played so well without Luka. Sure Chet Holmgren also didn’t play but removing the star player from the team shouldn’t be THAT positive. I hope it’s not something bigger…

• Why are so many people addicted to Coke Zero or Diet Coke but never both?

• I hate owning a house, I wouldn’t have to deal with this crap if this wasn’t my house. It’s not even my house, I still have more than 25 years left of paying on this thing. Oh God when will it end. What if I get fired? What if everything hits the fan in the next four years and I actually don’t even ever get to pay it off cus I get sent to some labor camp? What if nothing happens? I still have to pay this thing, and Next year some other tree will probably fall and I have to deal with that. The damn fence is falling apart too I gotta deal with that. I miss apartments where I didn’t even have to take trash out to the dumpster or the curb. Who the hell knows what’s gonna happen next year. I should probably start carrying around my passport, but what if I lose it. I don’t lose my wallet, but still it’s not a passport. I hope the worst doesn’t happen. Damn that’s a lot of wood dust? Saw dust. That’s a lot of Saw dust on the driveway.

• I bet that looked cool (when I carried a large chunk of heavy thick trunk and shot putted it)

• I bet that looked cool (when I tire flipped a large chunk of trunk to get it out of my neighbor’s driveway)

• I wish I had a blower so I don’t have to sweep this.

• Can’t believe the US Military was protecting poppy fields in Afghanistan during the occupation over there and no one made a big deal out of it.

• I hope this tree doesn’t die.

  ---

  You should Go on Bluesky

I loved Twitter, I joined in 2018 and it was my favorite social network for everything. Easily had the most screen time of any app. I also made many friends on there, in fact if you’re reading this in your email client and not in the site chances are I met you there. Still, since the purchase of the website by goober supreme Elon Musk, the site’s been going downhill and the last round of updates was the last straw.

I’d been on Bluesky since the beta back in July of last year and was hoping that it would take off. It looks like it’s doing so, slowly. At the very least posting has been fun again. You should join it and post some fun there. Especially cus we need more raza. Here’s some fun posts from the last few weeks:

Anyway, the place has the juice I think. There’s plenty of chatter around sports, memes getting thrown around. No brands yet. It’s a good time.

20 million users only so far so you can still get in early.
Find me over there at rod.pocho.online

Finally a song:

The Chicken Big Mac is an offense to all that is Big and Mac.

On October 17, 2024 I finally had one of these monstrosities after being hounded non stop (1 time) on Tiktok by ads for it. McDonald’s claims it’s just a normal Big Mac with the patties swapped for “two tempura-battered chicken patties” but to call these chicken-particulate stuffed fried circular objects “tempura-battered patties” is the biggest lie told in the history of the restaurant chain. Imagine a McNugget, now make it bigger and flatter and less crispy. Remove all the seasoning, add more sodium(Somehow) and give it flavor of frying oil more than anything else and THAT is what these “patties” are. I cannot over emphasize how flavorless they were. What makes matters worse is that the Mac Sauce CANNOT penetrate even one nanometer of the shell of the patty, it’s as if there’s an anti Mac Sauce shield on them. What that means is that upon biting the sandwich the Sauce just SLIPS out. The burger falls apart immediately within one bite. I know you may be thinking it’s a ME issue but I took to the streets (youtube) to see people eating this thing and it happens to EVERY SINGLE ONE.

With all the sauce ending up outside of the burger, the chicken nugget patty being blander than anything on the McDonald’s menu there’s still one more indignity that McDonald’s hits us with. There’s no diced onions on this so called Big Mac. No Onions, Sauce not sticking to anything, No Flavor. What is the point of this sandwich?

What makes everything worse is that McDonald’s WHEN THEY WANT TO can make a pretty decent sandwich. Think of the former McChicken since then renamed the “McCrispy” the chicken patties on those sandwiches are actually chicken patties, NOT enlarged chicken nuggets made of chicken slurry like the ones on the Chicken Big Mac.

The real reason why this exists can be found when listening to McDonald’s earning calls. Since 2018 McDonald’s has attempted to position itself as a “credible chicken player” and as recently as this year has made it clear that as Beef prices climb they’re aiming to “pivot to poultry” and apparently also pivot to flavorless, offensive, downright sacrilegious damage to their most trusted brands.

This is why this is the end of American Empire, an end that was expected, our decades of excess highlighted by the fact that beef an outrageously expensive source of protein was able to be consumed daily and in exorbitant quantities were bound to end. Never mind the lack of leadership at a global scale, or the dwindling cultural influence of American art, the obsession with AI, and the general glorification of ignorance within this country. The Golden Arches can’t even afford to make a Big Mac anymore. Worse yet, they can’t even put onions on their replacement.

Still, nothing encapsulates America better than The Big Mac…even the Chicken Big Mac. We are unable to stop a client state from committing genocide, unable to have functioning health care, or livable wages, unable to take care of our environment, frothing at the mouth to consume more and more of less and less. A Chicken Big Mac.

I sat in McDonalds and finished my disgusting sandwich. Ashamed, but glad it was over.

I hate what white America has done to Burritos. The bland flavorless massive “wraps” being filled to the point of bursting by all manner of bullshit. That’s the greatest offense done by white America to burritos, the disregard for tortillas. The tortilla is the most important part of the burrito, a freshly made, soft but durable, warm tortilla is what elevates a burrito from a food of convenience to a food that you crave and long for.

In many of the burrito places found in Juarez the cheapest burrito for sale is a “Burrito de Winnie”. It’s a guisado made of winnie, franks, hotdogs, whatever you wanna call them sauteed in onions, tomato, chile and tomato sauce. The winnies over on the Mexican side of the border are usually RED, as opposed to pink here on this side. So seeing the guisado de winnies next to the rest really makes it stand out, almost animated, a Studio Ghibli version of food. It’s also usually the cheapest burrito because winnies themselves are cheap. I know that the use of hot dogs as the protein in all kinds of food is not unique to Juarez, but this application at the very least is prevalent there. I hadn’t had one in years. Went from finding them at every burrito place, to never seeing them anywhere.

The regionality of food really stands out when you move far away from home. I’m often shocked/annoyed by people who say things like “There’s no real Mexican food restaurants in Dallas” when what they really mean is “There’s no INSERT REGION OF MEXICO HERE food restaurants that I grew up eating in Dallas”. The same holds true for any city in the USA, the point being people who say that sound incredibly stupid and haven’t really taken a time to be curious. Juarez/El Paso style food has it’s own uniqueness that I miss including but not limited to, Menudo having both hominy and meat and eaten with bread instead of tortilla, Colita de Pavo tortas, and of course simple elegant burritos where the flour tortillas is perfect. I often find myself craving a Juarez style burrito, hasta uno de winnie

This weekend I revisited Doña Maria in Dallas which proudly states on the side of the corner of the industrial building that houses it, “ESTILO CD JUAREZ CHIHUAHUA”

When I walked in I was in fact back in the border. I could just tell from the people that were eating there, and cooking there. It was all confirmed when I saw Burritos on the menu and the sign said “LOOK AT MEATS BELOW” and the red guisado with little round shapes screamed out at me. I had to have a burrito de winnie. It was perfect. The guisado was the perfect level of spicy and umami that I hadn’t had in forever, the beans that I Was asked if I wanted in the burrito hit me with that wholeness but the star was the tortilla. Juarez style flour tortillas are soft, barely fluffy but not quite pillowy. They’re buttery and have a bite but are never tough. Served warm, there’s few things in the world better.

Now this is a burrito.

The only thing that wasn’t quite like home is that this was not cheap enough to just “throw in” as an extra to my order but even then I didn’t mind.

I have a strange wish for the Juarez style burrito.

I dream of a world in which this simple, elegant, minimalist food can be treated in the way sushi is treated. I would love for there to be a place that exists where the burrero is able to highlight how beautiful and important the tortilla making process is. How the guisados that go in the tortilla are purposely made to shine when enveloped in that floury goodness. It may look simple, and it is, but the key exists in the mastery of the execution and respect of the ingredients. The hands that make these tortillas are as skilled and experienced as any sushi chef. These tortillas are as worthy of the reverence that any omakase is given.

I wish you all could taste a Juarez style burrito at least once, hasta uno de winnie.

What I found most compelling is that it seemed like it would be a silent movie, or at the very least one where an AI powered robot would be placed in a setting it doesn’t belong and find it’s utterly inept and useless in it. The robot would attempt to adapt, to learn, to optimize. I dreamed of some sort of allegory about how AI when confronted with the real world falls short and fails. That no amount of money and technological advancement can match the resiliency and survival instincts of a fox or a goose that have been honed through generations. In the process it would show the beauty of nature, of our world as it is and how our shaping of it has led to a flawed creation that try as it might, cannot fit in it. No matter what the neural network/genetic algorithms the robot applied to nature around it it wouldn’t be able to understand it. It had to experience it. It could be a reflection on our collective folly in trying to create life when it takes millennia for it to arrive, and it always does so in a harmony with the world around it not in the service of one species.

I of course didn’t know this was based on a kids book.

The movie itself is perfectly charming, I’m sure if the viewer is a parent it’s even moreso. It’s about the life changing power of caring, specifically for one’s child. The animation style is gorgeous. I’m glad it exists, there’s never enough animated movies out there as far as I’m concerned. I’m also glad it wasn’t a sequel.

Still, I dream of THAT AI movie that the original trailer put in my head.

In a city full of borders and demarcations this highway is the most border thing in it. The true edge of the edge in almost every way.. As a child every weekly drive to Juarez we’d go through this highway. My childhood church was a few blocks away from it. The state facility my older sister was moved to is right next to an exit off this highway. When we finally bought a home it was 5 houses away from it and it’s always in view. My middle school and highschool are washed by the sounds of cars rushing through it. I took it every single day I went to college. When I was dating my wife I’d drive to and from her house on it every day. As an adult I’d take it every weekend to go to church. I’ve now left El Paso for Dallas but everytime I drive back, a few yards after the “El Paso City limits” sign on I-10 approaching from the east I exit onto this highway, and that is when I’m truly home.

Situated right on the outskirts of everything it’s been privy not just to views of the S-Mart and La X in Juarez but it has also seen the joy in El Paso’s parks and defunct amusement parks, the frustrations in the growing lines to cross to and from the cities on either side of the bridges that it passes under. The laughter of the children that run in the school playgrounds on it’s banks that have grown accustomed to the clouds of dusts la migra’s childish driving spit up onto the air. It’s seen fences get taller, and military bases get larger. It’s also seen a city grow to the point that where it was once interrupted by traffic lights and surface level streets it’s now fully connected. 

If I-10 has shaped El Paso more than any other highway, this highway is the one that shaped the entirety of my life. This highway has taken me to or from innumerable significant experiences in my life. Almost every single exit on this stretch of road has some meaning or memory attached to it. Its location right against the edge of America simultaneously shows how different this side is while also proving the differences aren’t as big as they want to make me believe. If you’re not from El Paso chances are you don’t know it, but if you are you almost can’t avoid it. It’s not in the heart of anything, it’s on the outskirts. It borders everything. When drivers drive around I-10 feeling they can almost touch Juarez, there’s a whole world between the interstate and Mexico. 

That’s where this is.

This is the Border Highway.

In this project I will tell stories that all share The Border Highway in common. Taking a trip down this road making a stop at almost every exit before finding myself back at the border again. As always my goal is to communicate something about the border and the city I grew up in and love that only someone from there knows, while at the same time attempting to understand myself. As one of my favorite writers, Roberto Andrade Franco once said, You can never leave the border behind.

That’s how Variety announced that the iconic (Criterion Collection member no big deal ) 1987 film was going to be remade. Much like companies trying to inject AI into everything the immediate question that springs to mind is ‘Why?’. The Variety announcement didn’t offer much except for the following quote by Mucho Mas Media Founder and Co-CEO Javier Chapa which said: “We look to uphold and celebrate the original film in ways Luis Valdez and the filmmakers of ‘La Bamba’ made it a classic.”

Ah ok.

De Los Journalist Cerys Davies then reached out the the original filmmaker that Chapa name dropped to ask ‘Why?’ in a fantastic piece of journalism. And Right off the top it starts off with this “….Luis Valdez, the original director and writer, wants people to know: “This was not my choice.”

ANDELE.

In the rest of the piece Luis Valdez states that Chapa and Mucho Mas approached him about the remake and his question was also why? He goes on to point out that he and his brother undertook substantial research for the original movie and given that Ritchie Valens died at the age of 17 there’s really not much there that could be explored. This is why he was unsure of what exactly stood to be gained by this but he still chose to be involved because “I’ve always believed the negatives can be turned into positives, so in this case, I chose to help”. Valdez also points out that the movie rights are entirely owned by Sony, so he didn’t have any say in it. Again, he really wants us to know it’s not HIS idea.

I don’t blame him, especially when there’s so many OTHER stories that could be told….there had to be a reason right? Why the La Bamba Remake? What new angle could they take? Who controls the means of production?

I cracked it.

The film is being produced by Mucho Mas Media a Latino owned studio that’s had a number of productions already out both in theaters and on streaming platforms. The two biggest being The Long Game, a heartwarming(?) tale of 1950s south Texas and five young Mexican-American caddies, out of the love for the game, were determined to learn how to play, so they created their own golf course; and Blue Miracle, a Netflix film. Both of these are directed by Julio Quintana…but there’s something else in common that I believe is the key as to why and where the La Bamba Remake will go. Heres’s the movie posters for both of these:

Right there in the left of both of them. Jumping right at you with all the charisma of a once great star that’s now become a red giant star. Dennis Quaid himself.

I don’t know what what it is about D. Quaid but he’s seem to found himself in all these Mucho Mas Media productions. He’s like Rob Schneider to Adam Sandler or John Ratzenberger to Pixar. D Quaid is featured in more MMM productions than anyone else. I’m beginning to suspect Mucho Mas Media is just a Dennis Quaid delivery mechanism moreso than a Latino production studio. So naturally he would be involved in MMM’s La Bamba remake but doing WHAT exactly. Playing Ritchie himself of course.

As Luis Valdez correctly stated there’s not much ground that hasn’t been covered in Ritchie’s story, except for ONE angle. There’s been a rumor of sorts that Ritchie Valens was not in fact 17 years old, and the only evidence that people can produce is just to look at pictures of Ritchie and say “Does he look 17?”, he really kinda doesn’t. This is what MMM is going to (probably explore) and who better to play a not-really-17-year-old rock star than 70 year old Dennis Quaid. Especially when the whole reason the company exists is to ensure D Quaid gets D Paid.

There you go. I uncovered it. It was all there to plain as the eye can see, now you won’t be surprised when the trailer drops.

In all seriousness it sucks that this is getting remade and that Mucho Mas Media really is out here patting themselves on the back for doing this instead of taking on original stories. Which sure they will claim they have 4 original projects in post production right now, inclyding a Jenni Rivera series, but still No mames. There’s gotta better ways to make Dennis Quaid money than making him Ritchie Valens.

I’m learning to be ok with looking in the mirror, with looking at picture of myself.

Taking it as an act of survival, or even an act of rebellion or liberation has really helped.

I’m not quite there yet, but I feel like I’m getting better. I have a bit of a goal to take pictures with friends.

Listen to the full episode here:

I bought EA Sports NCAA College Football 25 and started the “Road To Glory” mode which is has the player playing the role of an individual college recruit who picks a school and then tries to take that school to a national championship. You don’t have too much control over your individual statistics in this mode but you can choose what level of recruit you are from a 5 star recruit which is the highest to a 1 star recruit. I made myself a 4 star recruit, because even in this fantasy I couldn’t go THAT far. I picked being a running back, a power back a real bruiser and to continue the realm of “Fantasy but somewhat grounded in reality” I chose to go to my alma mater. Many people refer to it as “The Harvard of The Borderland” I’m referring to THE University of Texas El Paso, aka UTEP.

UTEP is not a good football school, I didn’t know it at the time but I was a student during it’s glory days. Those glory days amounted to three consecutive bowl seasons and a Top 25 ranking for one of those years. Jordan Palmer the QB at the time ended up being a back up in the NFL for a few years and is now a trainer for QBs entering the Draft. The second best player on the team WR Johnnie Lee Higgins played in the league for a few years, and the absolute best player Thomas Howard was a very good linebacker in the NFL until his life was tragically cut short in a high speed crash. Since then the team hasn’t been good with one exception in Aaron Jones who is STILL in the league. I was going to follow in his footsteps and not only carry UTEP to national prominence, I was going to be a Heisman winner, at the very least an All-American. After all UTEP hadn’t had a 4 star recruit…ever? Until your boy.

It was amazing, I was tearing up the field. I was bigger and faster than everyone out there. Not only that but I looked super cool, I had the soft squishy helmet and the badass facemask with the dark visor. I had the thickly taped up ankles and the sleeves, mismatched gloves. I could run over anyone, or hurdle anyone. That is, if my Oline ever blocked for more than a half a second.

Each game during my first year was a whole lot of running into people that weren’t blocked for 90% of the game and 10% huge runs when I could break out of it. I made it to a bowl game anyway, and got second in the conference. No awards, No recognition. We lost the bowl game.

Second year, the same. Run for loss, run for loss, run for 45 yards. Won the conference though! No awards, no recognition. Third year, I was still the best player on the team and the team wasn’t growing around me. The O Line was still not blocking, the QB missing wide open throws. I lowered the difficulty, and it didn’t help much. Conference title, bowl win. No all american. No invite to the playoffs.

After the third year in my fantasy college life I graduated from UTEP. I don’t know what my degree was in but at some point I took a Marketing final. So probably marketing. Since I kept my GPA above a 3.7 for three years I graduated early. Now that I’d fulfilled the promise I made to my parents of graduating from college, even in fantasy land. I had to consider what to do with the last year of my football playing career.

I had to give up on the dream of taking UTEP to national relevance. I entered the transfer portal. I went to Ohio State. I did what so many people from the Borderland have done, I did what REAL LIFE ME did. I had to leave El Paso because the opportunities that existed there wouldn’t allow me to achieve the goals I wanted to. The difference was immediate, the Oline gave me more than enough space to rip off 10 yard runs when I would get 1 at UTEP. The talent around me was so much better too that I didn’t have the weight of having to audible everything to a run so I could do anything good. Your boy rushed for more than 1000 yards, and became an All-American, A Heisman finalist, The top RB in the country! IN ONE YEAR. Not only that I won the National Championship!

Still, I failed at my fantasy.

I wanted to do in this fake world what I couldn’t do in real life. I wanted to stay home in El Paso and win there. Triumph there. I wanted some sign that if I had enough of an advantage I could overcome the fact that El Paso is overlooked and ignored and lacks the opportunities afforded to people in other larger cities. I wanted to imagine even in this fake world that I could have stayed there forever and been just fine. Where I didn’t have to miss my parents and have to hop on a plane to see them. Where I could eat colita de pavo whenever I wanted and enjoyed those desert sunsets every single night. Where I wouldn’t have to settle for earning half of what I earned in my first job out of El Paso. I wanted to live in a world where “Brain Drain” wasn’t a thing…but even in EA College Football fantasy-land that wasn’t possible.

I suck at escapism. I’m not supposed to feel bummed after it.

Ohio State Me joined the NFL.

Real Life Me started a new Road To Glory, with another version of Me. This time I made myself a 5 star recruit and picked UTEP again.

Suppose you’re a minority of any kind here in the United States and suppose you like to consume culture in any way shape or form. Without a doubt at some point you’d start getting some favorites, drawn to certain authors or creators or whatever right? Something about them would draw you into them, some sensibility some commonality. Something. The point is you see something of yourself in them or their work that resonates with you and so inevitably they become, as Marc Maron would say, “your guys”. So you keep on consuming content from your guys and then at some point you’ll run into something that they did that very clearly points out that you’re not the intended audience. It’s jarring, it’s upsetting, it’s lame, it’s everything…it’s confusing mostly. And for me at least it leaves me feeling kinda stupid? Karla talks about running up against the misogyny in Philip Roth’s writing and how it actively pushed her away, my example isn’t as harsh but it’s still true.

After I learned enough english to start to get comedies in english I would watch as many of them as I could. Syndicated shows were my bread and butter. Every night before bed I’d watch The Simpsons, or Fresh Prince of Bel Air, or Seinfeld. Jerry’s little stand up bits at the beginning of the show were sort of aspirational for me, I thought I could do that. The fact that he just hung around his house all day was also aspirational for me. The point is, I got into Seinfeld. I was repeating phrases from the show (Nothing as bad as a buddy of mine who tried to drop the Seinfeld “hand” phrase thing in normal conversation and is still roasted about it to this day) my friends and I would come up with nicknames for everyone, all that. Mexicans kids from the lower valley of El Paso, literally a stone’s throw away from the border fence, talking about David Putty. It’s nuts, but it worked. It was fun. Seinfeld was our guy, the show was our show.

That was until the “Seltzer vs Salsa” bit, I’ll never forget it. George and Jerry are out there ranting about how no one can tell the difference between wether they’re asking for Seltzer, or Salsa. It was the whitest thing I’d ever seen in television. Not just in television. Ever. It slapped me right across the face THIS IS NOT YOUR WORLD. It was jarring.

There should be a word for that treasonous moment when one of your cultural guys turns out to be just a stranger. Maybe treason is as good.

I hate to be part of any discourse(derogatory) especially on such a niche platform as Substack, but there’s been a few posts rolling around here on the bigger sites about how as the cultural “center of the galaxy” twitter is dying there’s less places for people to go to to get a pulse of culture at large. To them all I say, welcome to the club! there’s never been a cultural center for Pochos or Latinos anywhere online on the American internet. We’ve all had to make due with finding pockets where we can, resonating with people who are not like us. Finding like minded but incomplete cultural reference points. Inevitably also being confronted with the treason of finding out we’re not the intended audience. There’s never been a center of the cultural internet. It’s only that the white one was super loud. Everything’s been going down in the WhatsApp group chats for decades but those are silent.

It’ll be interesting to see how more and more online people branch out to what resonates with them and how they’ll navigate when they inevability find out their favorite creator is not infact “just like me fr”.

As for anyone reading this, unless you know what a taco de tripa taste like or what’s the biggest difference between Mexican and American bologna is, or what a sensu bean is, If you’ve never heard the song Mil Heridas by Cuisillos or FANCY by Twice or Kick Push by Lupe Fiasco, or been told “wow you’re so well spoken” or been in a place where you’re the only one who can talk to “the help”. Unless you’ve experienced a couple of those and similar things to that you are not the intended audience for this. But it’s ok, you can be like me and the rest of us and find something here that resonates with you. If I could find something in common with George Costanza you can definitely find something that resonates with you with this Pocho.

I was listening in English 341: The Postmodern Novel when we spent two weeks studying the campus novel, a genre that gained traction in the 1950s and explored tenure-track malaise and the existential crises of professors and students on campuses primarily in New England. The main attraction is the sex. Here are titles of the books in Philip Roth's David Kepesh trilogy: The Breast, The Professor of Desire, The Dying Animal. The Dying Animal was my favorite. The novel's protagonist, a literature professor, describes his young Cuban American student (he's already described her "gorgeous breasts") in this way: "She thinks, I'm telling him who I am. He's interested in who I am. That is true, but I am curious about who she is because I want to fuck her. I don't need all of this great interest in Kafka and Velázquez. Having this conversation with her, I am thinking, How much more am I going to have to go through? Three hours? Four? Will I go as far as eight hours? Twenty minutes into the veiling and already I'm wondering, what does any of this have to do with her skin and how she carries herself?"

So I learned that!

So I guess I do know what A campus novel is….but Catalina was definitely so much more than that.

Villavicencio’s first book, The Undocumented Americans, is a non-fiction work that demolishes the romantic idea of the “model immigrant” and how immigration is valuable because all of these people come here with a dream and to improve “our country”. The truth is, many of these people never wanted to come, and they don’t have to EARN anything to be treated with the dignity and respect afforded to any human being.Villavicencio also included a lot of her own story, as she was herself also undocumented. It was super raw, super real, moving, hilarious, sad, and at times super uncomfortable. But that’s exactly why I enjoyed that book so much. She continues this same style of writing only in a semi-autobiographical fiction form in Catalina.

I don’t want to spoil too much of the book here, first of all because I do think everyone reading THIS should read THAT asap. Secondly, because I did try to get her on my podcast by sending an email to the contact email on her IG. (Side Note anyone who knows her reading this please let her know El Pochcast is not that bad) So I don’t wanna burn the stuff I’d ask or bring up with her in a potential interview. Still, one thing I enjoyed so much in this book is that anytime she included Spanish it was not italicized. I really really dislike the italicization of Spanish, mostly because as a pocho I don’t even notice sometimes when I’ve gone into Spanish then back to english. It just happens, it’s not anything worth pointing out. My tone of voice doesn’t change, my rhythm doesn’t change. In fact I sometimes switch back and forth to create a more satisfying rhythm so italics in a Spanish word is always super disruptive in the worst way for me. She even drops a “disque” which is one of my favorite phrases, “disque-lawyer” "disque-cantante”, “disque-novia” solid way to undermine and dismiss anything/anyone with two little syllables.

Ok, one more thing. Catalina Ituralde the book’s protagonist goes to Harvard, I think Villavicencio does too, That’s something else I’d like to talk about because it seems based on anyone I’ve spoken to who went to those Eastern schools that being Latine at Ivy League schools sucks intensely. Still in the book she says something like “It takes a certain kind of person to go to Harvard, because it takes a certain kind of person to apply to Harvard” something like that. Henry Kissinger went to Harvard too, in fact he’s Catalina’s favorite alumn. She’s even sometimes envious of her. All the Kissinger in this is darkly hilarious. I wonder how much of that is true for Villavicencio herself.

Read Catalina.

I didn’t just read a book, I also watched a movie

Didi is about a 13 year old boy and how he spent the summer before highschool going through the violently emotional changes that only happen when one is a young teenager. The movie is set in 2008 and there’s so much late stage “good internet” on it that it made deeply nostalgic. This was the nadir of Instant Messengers, and Myspace Layouts. Facebook had just launched for everyone not in those specially selected colleges and Youtube was still mostly short clips and people were starting to find out they could get millions of views by posting instructional content. Before the internet was a series of paywalled gardens and platforms.

Telling you, best era.

There’s one part that was literally me on the screen. SmarterChild was a chatbot on AIM that was always on and would answer anything you put in there with surprisingly good (for 2005-2009) logic. I used to spend HOURS talking to that thing, it was when I first heard of the turing test and so I reveled in the fact that I could make that thing fail the test over and over and it would “get annoyed” at me. I would then save those text logs and post them on my livejournal. Those got about as many views as this newsletter. Didi, talks to SmarterChild when he screws up ANOTHER thing and loses a friend group. I too went to SmarterChild when I needed to vent and get something off my chest. I hope it never really goes sentient, cus I’m in trouble for putting that thing in an emotional roller coaster.

The other thing that this movie does so well is capture that inevitable shift that happens in friend groups when going from middle school to high school. For some reason or another it tends to happen, for me it was that my closest “every day hangout” friend got a car and started going out for lunch every day, and I didn’t have money for that. So I found myself a new “every day hang out” group of friends. I would still talk to my other friends, but there was an undeaniable shift because of that. I didn’t really realize that until I saw it happen in Didi.

Also, really great heartbreaking scenes with his mom.

Watch Didi.

Finally, a youtube video worth watching

WhistlinDiesel is one of the top “spend a lot of money to destroy something cool as chaotically as possible” Youtubers out there. There’s a lot of them. They can be fun. It’s my trash reality tv. Being into cars I’ve run into a few of them before as most of these guys also have a fair amount of car love/knowledge themselves. It’s like really high production value “let’s throw the biggest rock we can into the lake” type of videos.

WhistlinDiesel is famous for abusing cars in extreme ways, dude bought a Ferrari F8 and accidentally burnt it to a crisp after he tried to use it as a farm vehicle. He’s also famously been unable to destroy a Toyota Hilux to the point it’s become unfixable. WhistlinDiesel is also a bit of a bro, who loves Tesla and Elon.

Which is what makes this video so much better.

Dude wrecks this thing and it breaks in the most hilarious ways. Including one very dangerous one where the tow hook just breaks off the body and he discovers the tow hook is tied to NOTHING.(5:48)

Profoundly entertaining video, I really don’t think WhistlinDiesel expected this to go so bad. But it’s a super entertaining view into how BROKEN and BAD the Cybertruck is when it’s doing anything above terrorizing suburban neighborhood roads. Plus it made Elon boys suuuuper pissed off.

Read more

The trend of trying to explain is still ongoing, in fact go google “lonely men” like I did above and you’ll be smacked by all the articles in the world. I recently found a podcast episode that lured me in with a baity title. “Robert Putnam Knows Why You’re Lonely”. The podcast is “The Interview” hosted by Lulu Garcia-Navarro, by the NY Times. So I listened so that this guy could tell me what’s up.

Robert Putnam apparently has been calling this loneliness since the 90s. “People don’t join bowling leagues anymore!” he cried to the heavens and Presidents listened. Invited him over to hang out, then nothing happened. Back in the 90s he blamed TV, now he blames Social Media. In all seriousness though, the pod was pretty interesting. Putnam discusses two types of social capital, bridging social capital and bonding social capital. Bonding is the type that you make with people who SHARE some belief or view you have, or some sort of similarity. Bridging social capital is the kind that exists when someone who DON’T have something in common with enters your social sphere and you can still be social or engage with them despite your differences. Admittedly the second is harder to build and social media, in a bid to increase engagement, has cocooned us in echo chambers. So there’s definitely SOMETHING to blame social media about. Echo chambers embolden people, and cement us in the type of Bonding social capital that can lead to type of social societies that march on charlottesville for instance. Or the Border Patrol facebook group that breed all those horrific memes about dead people. Putnam encourage face to face interaction, it’s apparently a lot harder to be racist or dismissive when you see somone face to face, one on one. And Sure.

All of that was good, but there was no WHY to it. Old people spamming Facebook Groups doesn’t explain why I’M lonely. In my opinion Lulu Garcia-Navarro ALMOST gets Putnam there. Putnam talks about periods in American history when from a “social capital” standpoint we were better. That time being 1910-1965. People were more trusting of each other, took time to meet their neighbors…all of that. Then Putnam also mentions how social capital has been down since that time. He briefly mentions that NOW Inequality is at an all time high even going so far as to call the modern era a “Second gilded age”….but then goes on to talk about the media.

AND HERE IS where I personally feel the biggest disconnect, or reason why I’m lonely. Work. Sucks. Americans are being squeezed dry and we can’t afford anything. Capitalism and Greed have made it so that American worker’s purchasing power at an all time low. Putnam wants us to meet face to face for Tupperware parties but fails to recognize that it takes 1 hour to get home from work because it’s too expensive to live where we work and there’s no public transportation so I gotta rot my brain and body in traffic. Nevermind that nobody actually has a home to have these face to face meetings in, and that everyone is one skipped paycheck or one hospital visit from total bankruptcy.

Everyone is working more, for less than ever before. That’s exhausting. There is no “inflation” though, inflation is just another word for corporate greed. Chipotle just announced record Q2 profits after raising prices 4x since Covid and instead of lowering prices or passing that to their employees they engaged in stock buy backs and gave their CEO a big paycheck. Inflation is on the hands of those that set the prices. That’s it. It’s not magic.

I truly believe to ignore the tolls of Capitalism on the pysche of the American worker is missing the larger picture. There's very limited amount of leisure time, there’s even less mental and wage security. Social safety nets are non existant. Existential crisis abounds, and we’re all too tired too anxious about the future about the medical bills about the weird noise the car was making and about how rent prices are going to go up at the end of this lease to go out bowling.

It’s economics.

To be even more personal. Even if one is lucky enough to have A LITTLE BIT saved up, that doesn’t account for the dread of an aging immigrant populace that were THEMSELVES squeezed dry by capitalism and was left WITHOUT pensions or any sort of retirement plan where one finds themselves now being their retirement plan. This is real, this is common for many people like me.

So yes it’s lonely, and I’m not angry. I’m just tired.

A couple of things:

• Apparently no one likes Newsletters on Saturdays? I sent the last Liner Notes episode on Saturday and about 15% less of you opened it! What day works best for reading through your email?

• If you want to read some LEGIT great writing read Roberto Andrade Franco’s ESPN piece on Olympic Boxer Jennifer Lozano. I don’t care if you don’t like Boxing, it’s just amazing writing. Roberto writes about the border like no one else.

• The olympics are on and I’m background watching. USA dominance on swimming seems to be over. Rugby is fun. Indoor Volleyball is fun. Shooting is getting all the memes right now, especially Korean shooter Kim Ye-ji. Apparently the target they shoot at is about the same size as a period in Times New Roman font size 12?! That’s crazy

  

• Finally a Tiktok from my conversation with Maria Garcia:
  

  

  @elpochcastwhy do we care about the border had Maria Garcia on the podcast to talk about her fantastic podcast "My Divo" and since we're both from the border I asked why does she think people from the border who have left it have such an obsession with the border in their story telling #elpaso #border #pocho #mydivo

  Tiktok failed to load.
  
  Enable 3rd party cookies or use another browser

That’s it! Ahi nos vemos!

I mention it at the top and in the first “Question” I made to Maria Garcia, creator and host of the Juan Gabriel Podcast “My Divo”, I really was conflicted about this podcast existing because of what a giant Juan Ga is. Also, can you tell I have no formal journalistic education by even phrasing that question in the way I did? But, the podcast is great. It’s my favorite of the year and you should listen to it.

Something that we get into in the pochcast episode is how one of the aspects of loving Juan Ga has to do with the fact that he’s from The Border. That’s a big deal, in a very real way people from El Paso/Juarez across a couple of generations have a connection to him. My mom and I are no exception, It was especially apparent to me the day that Juan Ga died.

The day that Juan Ga died, Sunday August 28, 2016 I had the misfortune of being in an Olive Garden in the Dallas Suburbs. I don’t mind a chain restaurant but the Olive Garden has to be one of the worst chains out there. First of all, it’s expensive. These people are charging Five Guys level of money. Secondly, the food isn’t that good? All the pasta is mushy and all the sauce taste the same and it’s all covered up because everyone just covers every plate in about 3 lbs of cheese. Those breadsticks are way too dense. You get the point. I was there Sunday at night, against my will but I was eating the SINCE THEN DISCONTINUED one decent-ish thing on the menu (Braised beef tortellini) when I logged onto Twitter to do some scrolling and my feed was overtaken with news that Juan Gabriel had passed away in Santa Monica, California of an alleged heart attack.

My reaction was more instinctual than anything. I may have gasped. When I looked up from my phone my wife was already looking at me saying “What?” and I just said “Juan Gabriel died” and she just kinda answered something like “Oh no, that’s sad” but instead of answering her I stood up and walked out of the restaurant and dialed my mom. To my surprise she answered within three rings.

” ‘Ama, se murio Juan Gabriel.”
”Ya se Hijo, lo acabo de ver en las noticias.”

”Que hacemos?”

“No se Hijo”

I literally asked, Que Hacemos? I didn’t know what to feel other than a profound sense of loss, to the point that I had to call my mother. I don’t know what I expected her to say but I knew that she would at the very least feel the same way I did. I’m by no means a Juan Gabriel stan but to this day his music is always occasionally played. There’s a dozen or so songs of his in my “Liked” songs on Spotify. References or lines from his songs are common in my memetic language I’ve developed with family. The fact that he would no longer exist and make music was sad.

I went back inside and finished my mid tortellini and spent the evening listening to Juan Ga songs with my wife and telling stories about my life/family tied around them including the Canal 56 “Juarez es el No. 1” spots that really made Juarez seem like a big fun city during my childhood. How I would spam that song (and Return of the Tres) in the Computer Science lab during my college years to the chagrin of all the white nerds in there who would respond with some form of metal. The Kumbia Kings collab with Juanga. How my oldest sister loves “Tus Ojos Mexicanos Lindos” and has loved it since she was a toddler. Of course, the Bellas Artes Concert which we saw almost in it’s entirety but especially the “Hasta Que Te Conoci” Performance. His music has truly had an impact in my life.

There will never be another artist like Juan Gabriel.

Screw The Olive Garden.

Listen to the full episode here:

In this episode of El Pochcast I spend a little under an hour talking with Iván Fernandez about the current state of Mexican Soccer but I think it’s worth going into WHY I care about this team.

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about this so I’m not gonna belabor it. It really comes down to A major point and a subpoint of that.

Cheering for Mexico’s soccer team is a link to Mexico itself

Being a Pocho, supporting/following the National Team was a very easy way to get some Mexa street cred. Talking about the game and being able to name players and where they played at or drop some fact about em and you’re in. It’s the team of my parents. It’s the only reason why I learned the Mexican National Anthem just incase I ever attend a World Cup game I could scream it loudly. It is Mexican to support Mexico. Simple.

But here’s the biggest one…

Soccer is not an American thing, it’s our thing

Asi nomas.

I KNOW the American Women are the GOATs…but still.

There’s this line in the Rafa Marquez Netflix documentary in which Rafa talks about his disdain for the USMNT and he says something along the lines of

“They’re a superpower and they’re the best at every other sport but not this one, this one is ours”

I feel that in my bones.

For years soccer was ignored here, relegated to the “Weird foreign sport”. The Gabachos who DID care about soccer were weirdo gingers with beards and long hair. Everyone knew it too.

Soccer is ours. Not theirs.

The Big Green, Disney’s children soccer movie. Made the BEST player in the team a Mexican kid from El Paso. It’s ours.

In fact growing up (and even now) El Paso Texas was not a powerhouse in any sport at the state level except for Soccer. Schools from Dallas and Austin feared El Paso schools. There’s been multiple state champions. It’s ours.

Every effort to make it theirs is lame. I had an encounter with it later.

Like a lot of Mexican kids I played organized soccer growing up. It was some league, we’d play on Saturdays and it was all Mexican kids. At one particular game this white guy showed up, watched us play, and during the game approached the lady who ran our team, her name was Rosario. After the game she told my friend Manny, who was the best kid on the team, and me if we’d be interested in attending some info session for his AYSO team.

AYSO is officially a part of the US Soccer system and this dude immediately looked like a douche. This man had on a visor like if he was a football coach at Oklahoma State. He gave us some crappy duffel bag to mark our “invitation” and left.

I didn’t go.

A couple of weeks later dude called my house, my mom not speaking English very well answered the phone and asked for clarification wether he wanted to speak to me or my dad and my mom handed me the phone looking puzzled and stood close enough that she could hear what was being said to me.

”Why didn’t you show up?”
”I don’t know.”

The guy then went on to say there was another camp coming up and that I should go and he’d make a space for me. I said no, and then he said to just come and take a look, I don’t have to do anything else beside look. Hung up, and my mom said that it wouldn’t hurt to go look. No commitment.

The camp was in Bowie highschool, right after school at like 4pm. My mom drives me there and I get down to see a bunch of kids in cleats running up and down doing some stupid drill with those dorky little cones. Visor boy blows a whistle and signals me over, I walk over and he says “Where’s your fucking gear?” I had no idea what he’s talking about but right away didn’t like that this doofus was cussing at me. I didn’t have soccer “gear” I just wore whatever shorts and shirt and cleats I had. Furthermore I wasn’t even coming for anything just to watch. "Suit up and get out there” I told him I didn’t bring anything and he just looked at me with a stupid face. I don’t remember exactly what he said after but it was along the lines of “Didn’t you read the letter?”

At this point my mom stepped in and said “Vamonos mijo”

When I got home I found the stupid duffel bag and inside it was a sheet of paper listing some “equipment” required for the camp. It included multiple shorts, shirts, socks, tape, and stupid little cones. I’d never used these in any game before. The hell kinda crap is this.

And that was the last time I interacted with anything related to US Soccer.
Buncha dorks, with their cheap ass duffels. Running around orange nipples in the grass. Playing stupid, soulless soccer. No one on that field was laughing or having a good time. No one looked cool. Dude was wearing a visor. Now they’re rocking scarves.

American soccer is swagless. Their coolest player of all time is from Nacogdoches. Their best player of all time was bald at 20. They played in denim at one point. The players can’t beat the allegations of not being good enough at Basketball or Football. The only thing dorkier than them is the 2nd division english teams they go to play for because there’s no language barrier to cross the sea, Sheffield Wednesday NO SEAS MAMON. American soccer is a safe sport for rich kids who grew being handed duffel bags with a list of materials required to be able to play.

A couple of years after the encounter with Visor guy, Mexico was eliminated from the 2002 World Cup by the dorks of the USMNT. I cried in front of my dad as we watched the game. I was so angry, I hated them. Visor dork was on my mind when Rafa Marquez, in a fit of rage, head butted Cobi Jones in the jaw. Dirty. Dangerous. Reckless. Stupid. But it’s what I wanted to do to Visor guy who embarrassed me and made me feel so little with his stupid duffel bag. I’ll always love Rafa Marquez for that.

I don’t think Mexico will win a world cup.
I think the USMNT is better now. Probably will continue being better.

The worst part is? There’s been a number of high profile El Paso players who have chosen USMNT over Mexico….

But even then I will never support them. Dorks.

It’s our thing.

Listen to the full episode here: